My strength comes from my willingness to allow goodness to come into my life.
This sounds easy, but it isn't.
I embodied that very belief and awareness when I was young, but I never had the cause to identify it and I didn't know what it was or the power it held.
I was so young and so naive that I had no label for this strength. This was my superpower and I had no idea how incredible it was or how fortunate I was to wield this ability at an early age.
It was just the way I thought: the way I processed life's circumstances. Looking back I'm amazed at what I accomplished because of the strong belief I had in myself. The state of mind could've served me well throughout my entire life except there came a time when I couldn't grasp it anymore. I didn't see that very subtle, but important shift away from it because I did not comprehend the value of what I possessed. I didn't know why my life had flowed with ease and perfection and so I didn't know why it stopped.
I began to struggle with my life. There was no longer the ease and flow. Nothing clicked. I felt ill. I was ill. There was no longer any awareness of my inner strength. My mind's eye began to look to the outside instead. My thoughts and my beliefs began to disallow that goodness to come into my life and I didn't know why. I didn't see the difference as a change in my core beliefs, but as a progression in my life. I thought I was just becoming more realistic and growing up (quite the opposite) and I didn't realize it was really that I was losing touch with myself - losing awareness. I didn't know that all the negative influences were coming from me. The disconnect in my life was generated from what I began to incorrectly believe about myself. I thought the unhappiness I felt was caused from things and circumstances outside of me, but it was not.
Somewhere (thankfully) along the line I was jolted back into realizing what I was doing to myself when I looked to the outside for my self-worth, my value, my successes, and my joy. I clearly saw that path of self sabotoge and turned and ran the other way. I began to move back into the place where I could find myself.
Awareness came back to the forefront.
I regained the understanding that your thoughts form your life.
That your beliefs mold your experiences.
That your joy comes from within...
That you attract what you give out and you bring into your life what you give to others.
Thoughts matter.
Words matter.
Self-talk really matters.
I am fortunate that I regained this understanding at a critical point in my life.
I needed to be the mother that I am for my children when they needed me most.
I needed to be the daughter and the sister I was at life-changing moments.
I needed to be the coworker, and teacher, and friend, and family member I was at pivotal times for others.
I needed to be a non-judgemental advocate and educator on behalf of a human rights movement when I was needed to stand up and speak, but most importantly
I needed to be there for myself...and I am.
I am strong because I know this to be true and even more importantly, I know we can all be strong because we can and must believe in ourselves.
We are all connected. We are all the same.